one cake to rule them all.
One cake to find them
Ummmm Totally making this. It doesn’t even need it be for a birthday party.
I will buy some cake mix and have at it.
It began with the baking of the Great Cakes.
Three cakes were given to the Elves, immortal, wisest, and fairest of all beings.
Seven cakes to the Dwarf Lords, great miners and craftsmen of the mountain halls.
And nine… nine cakes were gifted to race of Men who, above all else, desire sugar.
But they were, all of them, deceived, for another cake was made. In the land of Mordor, in the ovens of Mount Doom, the Dark Lord Sauron baked in secret a master Cake, to control all others. And into this Cake he poured his vanilla, his chocolate and his will to consume all cakes. One Cake to rule them all.
One Cake to rule them all:
One c. sugar to flavor them,
One c. flour to bring them all,
and an egg to, in the oven, bind them.
I just kept reading and it just kept getting better
(Source: dalenawin, via yourpervert)
"Cakes have gotten a bad rap. People equate virtue with turning down dessert. There is always one person at the table who holds up her hand when I serve the cake. No, really, I couldn’t she says, and then gives her flat stomach a conspiratorial little pat. Everyone who is pressing a fork into that first tender layer looks at the person who declined the plate, and they all think, That person is better than I am. That person has discipline. But that isn’t a person with discipline; that is a person who has completely lost touch with joy. A slice of cake never made anybody fat. You don’t eat the whole cake. You don’t eat a cake every day of your life. You take the cake when it is offered because the cake is delicious. You have a slice of cake and what it reminds you of is someplace that’s safe, uncomplicated, without stress. A cake is a party, a birthday, a wedding. A cake is what’s served on the happiest days of your life. This is a story of how my life was saved by cake, so, of course, if sides are to be taken, I will always take the side of cake."